These are actual comments made by South Carolina Troopers that were taken off their car videos: 1. “You know, stop lights don’t come any redder than the one you just went through.” 2. “Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch after you wear them a while.” 3. “If you take your hands […]
The police stop a senior citizen early in the morning for driving erratically; they ask why he is out so late at night. The man replies, “I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, relationships as well as smoking and staying out late.” […]
Funny Police Stories Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house […]
Orville Smith, a store manager for Best Buy in Augusta, Georgia, told police he observed a male customer, later identified as Tyrone Jackson of Augusta, on surveillance cameras putting a laptop computer under his jacket… When confronted the man became irate, knocked down an employee, drew a knife and ran for the door. Outside on […]
Narcotics -Immediately grow facial hair, tell everybody you were ordered to. -Start watching every episode of Monster Garage. -Buy a biker wallet with a big chain. -Make every case involve overtime $$$. -Buy bunches of boats, RV’s, and motorcycles with that overtime. -Learn to play golf drunk. SWAT -Wear team T-shirts, Oakley sunglasses and boots […]
You know you are a cop when: You have the bladder capacity of two people. You have put handcuffs on someone & it wasn’t for fun. You believe that most people you meet are a waste of valuable air. Your idea of a good time is a “Man with a gun” call. You conduct a […]
One day a florist goes to a barber for a haircut. After the cut he asked about his bill and the barber replies, ‘I cannot accept money from you. ‘I’m doing community service this week.’ The florist is pleased and leaves the shop. Next morning when the barber goes to open his shop, there is a […]
WOULDN’T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH? My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been completed. Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete. […]
I don’t claim in any way to be the author of any of these but I do like them. “God believes in separation of church and state, it’s call the Rapture!” “If you find a job you like you won’t work a day in your life.” “Men love who they are attracted to, woman are […]